5 Ways to Protect Yourself from Energy Vampires

You know when you’ve hung out with someone and all they do is talk about their terrible, terrible misfortunes?  Going on and on about the same thing?  They are unhappy, always complaining, blaming and a drama queen?  You can barely get a word in edgewise and you leave feeling like the life has literally been sucked out of you?
Those, my friends, are Energy Vampires and you need to beware.
Energy Vampires are people who feed off of others’ energy in hopes to seek happiness outside of themselves.  What they lack from within, they seek to find from others.
Ironically enough, as a Highly Sensitive Person, the one thing I’m drawn to BUT need to distance myself from are Energy Vampires.  My healing abilities can quickly turn into “rescuing” if I’m not careful.  And let me tell you, Energy Vampires FEED off of people like me.
Some of the types and signs of Energy Vampires:
  • The Blamer – They always have an excuse why someone else caused their issue
  • The Drama Queen – They are larger than life, attention seeking, negative
  • The Entertainer – Needing to be center of attention, always turned “on”
  • The Gossiper – They feed off of the drama in other people’s lives
  • The Guilt-Tripper – They use shame and guilt to get what they want
  • The Insecure – They have low self-esteem and a need for acceptance
  • The Victim – Everything has happened to them, life isn’t fair
I’m sure you know a few.  Maybe it’s your husband or wife or parent or best friend.  Or maybe, without even knowing it, you yourself are one!  This isn’t something I like to admit to but I definitely have been one in the past.  Between being a Highly Sensitive Person (where my energy is constantly being affected by my environment) and having issues with codependency (where my self-worth was dependent on others) I have done my fair share of sucking the energy out of people.
In one of the darkest part of my life my energy was so low that I would rob someone, who was very close to me, of their energy.  I was so needy that when I look back at that time I’m embarrassed and ashamed.  I wasn’t aware at the time because I was trying to heal a lot of pain.  Thankfully, in the process of becoming emotionally healthy, I have been able to recognize and change this!  This has meant I’ve spent a lot of time learning how to maintain, protect, and nurture my own energy levels without fueling off of others.  Unfortunately though, we will still run into people who aren’t as aware so I wanted to share some tips on how to protect yourself.

Here are 5 main ways to protect yourself from Energy Vampires!

1. Be Aware of the People in Your Life

 All you really need is to meet someone once to know if they are an Energy Vampire.  Whether it is a class clown who is “on” 24/7 or a friend who complains nonstop, being aware is vital.  Look for the signs above so you can stay in control of the situation.  Also, take a mental inventory of the people in your life. Identify the people you feel really good with and the people who exhaust you.

2. Stay Neutral

Energy Vampires will not be able to get their “fix” if you stay neutral.  By not feeding into their drama they will get bored and move onto someone who will feed their need of energy and attention.

3. Set Clear and Firm Boundaries

Some of the people we love the most are Energy Vampires.  We don’t want to cut them out of our lives but we need to protect ourselves by setting firm boundaries.  Set a time limit when engaging with them.  Communicate with compassion your need to shift the conversation.

4. Build an Energy Shield Around You

My old therapist used to always say, “Imagine a pink light surrounding you.  It will protect you.”  I did it because I trusted her not because I fully understood anything about energy shields (I was only 19!).  But now I understand how it acts as an armor and keeps negative energy out.

5. Disassociate from Them

This can be really difficult if you’re a Highly Sensitive Person, as we not only feel our own emotions but the emotions of others.  Disassociating can leave you (temporarily!) feeling anxious, sad and guilty.  However, in some cases it is absolutely necessary.  I had a friend who exhausted me so much that if I didn’t disassociate myself with him I would have been miserable.  There was a lot of negative energy hanging over my head and affecting my life.  Since detaching, the guilt has completely gone away and I know I made the right decision.
It’s important to step back and see what you can learn from these situations.  Chances are your own issues are just being mirrored back to you.  If you’re consistently attracting people who are always making excuses then maybe that’s something you do too.  If you’re overly tolerant of people who are close to you, maybe you need to reevaluate how much you value yourself and your time.  Either way, this is a way to work on your own stuff and grow deeper into the person you want to be.
We will always encounter Energy Vampires from time to time or if you were like me, consistently!  Until I started protecting myself when I was around them.  Either way, I hope these 5 tips help you! 

source and courtesy: alongcameadog.com

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